McNation
by Lone Canadian
Summary: "WHAT THE HELL!" he wiped the dust and fallen debris from his eyes and stared into the face of England. The real man/country England! Not a Big Mac!


America was hungry. It wasn't like his usual twinge of hunger either and it couldn't be satisfied with _just _a stupid apple or carrot. He needed food, man. And good food too. Wow, that was a lot of oo's in that sentence! Hahaha!

He clicked the TV's off button and sat up, grabbing his wallet and pocketing his phone. Let's see…there was a Steak N' Shake a little ways away…and an Outback just a few miles south…but those weren't what his tummy was craving for at the moment. He needed a little more yummy-ness right now. So he headed off to the new McDonald's that opened up just a few miles away.

The sign was the first thing he saw, well, it wasn't much of a _clear _sight since he had forgotten his glasses and was struggling to see the sign at all but still, he saw it! The 'Mc' was definitely evident in the blurry mess. America pulled through the parking lot, into the drive through and waited for his turn at the giant menu sign and speaker-box-thing.

When he finally did get up there, he realized he couldn't see the menu at all! So he just ordered something he knew that they had.

"Hi, may I take your order?" the woman said through static-y sound waves.

"Yeah, I'd like a Big Mac, small fries, and a medium Diet Coke." He responded. He was trying to cut down on fast food and was proud of himself for getting only one burger and a smaller version of fries and a soda.

"Um…we don't have those, sir. Sorry."

"…what? But the Big Mac is the most famous thing about this place! This is insane. Fine, then what _do _you have?"

"We have an England if you're in the mood for some sarcastic bliss. Or if you just want some silent company, how about a Canada? You barely notice he's there! We also have a special today, two nations for the price of one!"

"Oh, did you guys switch up the names?" he thought for a moment. _Well, an England was probably a Big Mac_, he guessed. Why did they choose to name their food after countries? People have strange ideas these days.

"Okay, I'll take one England then."

"Would you like a Prussia with that?"

"Nah, I'm good. I'm pretty sure I got some Prussia's in my freezer I could heat up." America told the girl, thinking of a math equation: Prussia = Fries. Yum.

"Okay then, that'll be $5.95 and would you please come up to the next window?"

America drove forward and was surprised at what he saw. Even through the blurred soup he called vision, he could still see the plastic chute attached to the side of the restaurant that hung over the passenger seat of his car when he finally stopped at the window. _What the?_

"$5.95, please."

America was tugged out of his trance and dug in his wallet for six dollar bills. The girl, around 16-ish and with shoulder-length brunette hair, handed him his five cents. America opened his coin 'man-purse' that was shaped like a frog (from _Naruto_, dude) and dropped his change into the frog's open mouth. The girl turned back to her cash register and said into her headphone, "I need that England, here."

America eagerly awaited his "England"/Big Mac but was confused when the girl shut the window she had poked her head out to talk to him and get the money he owed. Then he heard banging from above him. He looked out of his window at the chute and saw that it was vibrating in sync with the sounds. Then it started seriously banging and America stuffed his head back in his car, afraid something might fall on his head and break it. Scary.

The noises traveled from the side of the fast food place all the way to above his passenger seat when all of a sudden, something crashed through the roof of his car, landing in the seat next to him and debris flying everywhere. "WHAT THE HELL?" he wiped the dust and fallen debris from his eyes and stared into the face of England. The real man/country England! Not a Big Mac!

"What are you doing in my car? And why did you have to fall through the ROOF? How am I supposed to fix that!" America was glaring at the hole in the roof of his only three-year-old car.

"Well, you shouldn't have gone through the drive-thru if you didn't have a car without a roof, git! Haven't you been here before?"

"Yeah, I have but last time I checked, they called their Big Macs "Big Macs" and they actually _WERE BIG MACS!" _America was getting pretty pissed now. How dare England be telling him off when _he _was the one who destroyed his roof! Not him!

"…America, are you wearing your glasses? No, you aren't." -England face-palmed- "This isn't McDonald's, twit. It's _McNation._"

"…what?"

"It's where you can buy countries. Not literally, but you can buy us." He pointed to himself and then at America. "You just didn't pay attention at the last meeting and forgot to sign your paperwork about this so that's why you aren't on the menu yet."

"Why would people want to buy us?"

"I don't know. They might want a friend for the day or something." England rolled his eyes at America's stupidity.

"This is so stupid, England. All I wanted was a Big Mac and I'm STILL Hungary! Lol, I made a country joke." America chuckled.

"Well then, go buy one. We can just go through the McDonald's drive-thru on the way back to your house."

"I still don't get the point of this fast-nation restaurant." mumbled America.

The two drove away from the absurd place while feeling a new breezing chill from the hole in the ceiling above them.

The next person in line finally reached the menu and waited for the woman to speak.

"Hi, welcome to McNation. May I take your order?"

"Yes, I would like…aw, there's no America! Fine…" she whined. "I'll just have a Russia then…and my friend wants a Prussia."

"Okay, move to the next window please. Your total is $9.53."

The girl and her friend squealed in their seats as they awaited their order. After the girl who ordered for the both of them gave the drive-thru lady her money, they heard the chute above them rumble. Soon enough, one Russia plopped into the second girl's lap. She scooted him to the back seat as a Prussia fell onto her lap as well. Both countries now in the back, the four drove away with an "OMG, I BOUGHT A RUSSIA! MY LOVE!" "PRUSSIA, I LOVE YOU!" "Of course, I am AWESOME!" and a "This is going to be fun, da?"

**Randomness is random. I got this idea while messaging my friend on here and it started with something about borrowing a country for the day, then Borrow-a-Prussia the next Build-a-Bear, and lastly, McNation! The two random girls at the end are moi and ma copine, LasagnaLover. Check her out and I'm sorry for just randomly writing this. I couldn't think of a good plot after he bought England so I was like "Screw it. I wanna buy Russia." and bought Russia mentally. LAWLZ. Hope you all liked this! I'll try to work on my Captain America/Hetalia crossover soon.**


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